Good day to you, dear readers, and say hello to my first article and the first weekend of 2013! It’s going to be a hell of a year, already dishing out surprises like a pop culture reference at Jack Rabbit Slim’s. A surprise upset by Texas Chainsaw 3D, as Leatherface occupies the top of the box office, even though its ratings just keep slipping away.

Now, Django has barely been out for two weeks, and it’s yet to claim financial superiority over everyone for even one weekend—but it doesn’t seem to be outlasting its competitors, likely due to its capacity for enjoyable multiple viewings. Not to mention that Quentin Tarantino’s films have always had financial success, especially in proportion to the budget he’s used.

To be honest, I love horror films—I’m a fan of the Final Destination franchise, and the first Saw, and a few others within that demented bloodbath-exploitation genre like the latest Friday the 13th, so long as they’re either intelligent or at least good fun. They’re guilty pleasures. But honestly, this whole Texas Chainsaw thing has me baffled.

I think it’s an act of nature we’ll never fully understand. As far as an educated guess? I’d say that there are legions of fans of an original classic that will follow its string of sequels and remakes anywhere and everywhere just on the off-chance that it might be good. I’m pretty sure that’s how Saw did it.

Next week’s new releases aren’t being too encouraging, what with A Haunted House looking more like a spinoff from a single unused sketch from Scary Movie 5; Gangster Squad being so timid on letting the critics take a look, only one of which was allowed to and mostly panned it and if Emma stone couldn’t save it who the hell can because she’s awesome; Storage 24 looks redundant, weak, and low-rated; and despite its undeniable greatness, Zero Dark Thirty is one long damn movie.

So, I figure that the box office won’t shift much from now till next time except that Texas Chainsaw 3D will see a huge drop, and Django Unchained at long last sees first at the box office as all its opponents continue to slowly slide away like amber from mere time. But I could just be hopeful, and biased, being a Quentin fan. Oh, and Kudos to Parental Guidance for hanging in there.

Have a great year everybody, start it off right. It’s been a tough one, but a good trip to the movies will always properly distract—which is why filmmakers do what they do. See you next week!

The First 2013 Weekend Results

1.) Texas Chainsaw 3D (LGF): Opening weekend, with $23 million.

2.) Django Unchained (Wein.): Second weekend, with $20.08 million.

3.) The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (WB): Fourth weekend, with $17.5 million.

4.) Les Miserables (2012) (Universal): Second weekend, with $16.2 million.

5.) Parental Guidance (Fox): Second weekend, with $10.12 million.

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